Good-bye, Dear Friend.
Posted on May 19th, 2010 at 10:12 pm by Megan in but seriously
I don’t know if anyone’s noticed, but this blog is making some changes. The focus is being lifted from geeky and stuff and is going to focus a little bit more on my life and its beautiful chaos that makes me stop and giggle. I want to share all of those giggles with you. I’m committing to posting more, at least once a week. I hope to hear feedback and all that good stuff from all of you because your input means a lot to me.
All that being said, the past week has been absolutely hellacious. My mentor and one of my heroes laid deteriorating in a hospital bed as one by one his organs gave out on him. The man who taught me how to face life head on with strength and integrity and never, ever stop fighting struggled for each breath until just before eight o’clock this morning. And I don’t care how creative a writer you are, there is nothing funny about death.
Sure, I could tell you the heart warming stories of this past week. How, after the nurses told us he was non-responsive and had no idea what was happening around him, his heart rate jumped up ten beats a minute during a catheter check. Or how he raised his eyebrows and squeezed the hell out of my hand when a friend asked “Do you want her to crawl in bed with you?”. But those stories couldn’t possibly reflect the life of this man.
Neither could the stories of how he constantly had visitors streaming in and out of his room, even at all hours of the night, such was his impact on the world. Or how they moved him into a larger room to accommodate the many people who wanted to say good-bye. Not even the powerful serenity that happened when nearly forty of us visitors stood out in the parking lot saying a last prayer for our hero.
I know a lot of words. Words to describe most situations any way I want to. Words to make you laugh and words to make you cry. But I don’t have enough words to tell you, a virtual stranger, how a grumpy old man with a swollen belly who walked with a cane made this world a better place. And I don’t have the words to tell you how much he will be missed every single day.
I’m sorry, reader. Next week I will have a fun story that will make you cringe in embarrassment for me. I’ll have all the right words for that. But until then, I’m going to miss my friend and try to carry on the many, many lessons he taught me on how to be the best person I can be. I miss you, Jim, and I love you dearly.
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great story megan and yes he will be missed did you see the picture I put on facebook thanks for writing